Leading as a Female Headteacher: Growth, Resilience, and the Power of Being an 8

As I reflect on my own journey, I often ask: How do young women see themselves in leadership roles? What messages do they internalise about ambition, confidence, and self-worth? If we, as female leaders, don’t model strength, resilience, and integrity—who will?

Yet, despite experience and qualifications, impostor syndrome has a way of creeping in. It’s something many women recognise, that quiet but persistent voice that questions whether we are truly capable, whether we deserve to be in the room. Studies show that women are far more likely than men to look at a job description and feel they need to meet every single criterion before applying, whereas men will apply when they meet just a handful. This isn’t about competence; it’s about the ingrained belief that we must be perfect to be enough. The truth is, we don’t need to tick every box we just need to be bold enough to step forward.

One of the biggest challenges of being a female head, particularly when working alongside male headteachers, is striking the right tone in meetings. Leadership often feels like a balancing act; being assertive without being labelled aggressive, being strategic without being seen as overly cautious, being passionate without being dismissed as emotional. I’ve learned that ensuring my voice is heard isn’t about shouting the loudest but about being unwavering in my stance. Strength is often quiet but firm.

Integrity, strength, and honesty are non-negotiables in leadership. Being a leader doesn’t mean having all the answers; it means making decisions with clarity and courage, even in uncertainty. One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned is that getting 80% of things right is good enough. Perfection is an impossible standard, and the fear of getting things wrong can be paralysing. Instead, I embrace mistakes as part of growth. Being able to say, “I got that wrong, and here’s what I learned from it,” is a strength, not a weakness.

This ties into something I talk about often; being an “8.” Growing up and working towards my goals, I realised that not every move I made would be a perfect 10. The pursuit of perfection can be exhausting and, ironically, self-defeating. But being an 8? That means being solid, dependable, and consistently good at what you do. I have lived my whole life as an 8, and it’s taken me exactly where I wanted to go. In leadership, as in life, consistency and reliability matter more than chasing an unattainable standard

Finally, one of my core beliefs is that when you break through the glass ceiling, you don’t just move forward, you turn around and help others through it too. I want the young women in my school to see leadership as an achievable goal, not an exception. Confidence isn’t something you wake up with; it’s built through experience, encouragement, and seeing others like you succeed. If I can do anything as a headteacher, it’s to give the next generation the strength and self-belief to know they can do the job and do it brilliantly.

Alexis Williamson-Jones

Headteacher

Nonsuch High School for Girls